How do you describe color to a one who is blind? For in essence, that is what I am trying to do with my writing. I am, as writers sometimes do, speaking figuratively. The blind cannot see with their eyes, as far as I know, we must remember that I’m not blind. Can the blind perceive the color? Can they differentiate between Blue, and Teal? I would think not, but I am not blind so I don’t know. For all I know I could be making an unwarranted assumption. What I am really asking is: How do you explain something to someone for which they, seemingly, have no reference frame? I’ll frame my topic sentence another way. I would like to use my writing to help people gain a sense of empathy for those with disabilities. But, they’re some things about having a disability, that I think only another person with a disability can truly understand.
For example, How do I explain what happens in the mind of a nine year old fourth grade wheelchair driver , when he is called Retard for the first time? How do I explain how it forever altered the way he saw him himself and those around him? It taught him that being different is tough, and that he will struggle with that knowledge for the rest of his life.
How do I explain what its like, to be that same wheelchair driver, now twenty-five years of age and to still hear the word Retard tossed about a college campus like an ultimate Frisbee?
How do I explain what goes through my mind ,as a wheelchair user, when I’m confronted with steps?
How do I explain what it feels like to be a grown man and wet the bed because I can’t make it to the toilet by myself?
How do I explain the way some people approach me, as If I’m a life-form they haven’t seen before and they aren’t quite sure what to do with me?
I need to explain these things to the reader in an accessible way so that they can have a frame of reference for their own lives. If I don’t give them that, the most I will get is sympathy. I don’t want sympathy from my readers, I want their empathy. If you want to understand the difference between sympathy and empathy, you need to understand why my parents chose not to give me the answers to my homework when I was little. They wanted me to arrive at the answer myself, so that I would understand why the answer was the answer. I want my readers to understand why a disability is sometimes hard. But I also want them to understand that folks with disabilities can still do lots of things. An empathic frame of reference would help them understand that. It is my task to try and give them one.