I know this is going to be a controversial topic. Maybe that is way I took so long to write it. I am going to write it anyway because I think its important. I want to talk about miracles. Specifically faith healing. “Why?,” you ask? Because I’ve experienced people I don’t know trying to come up to me while I was minding my own business and trying to heal me. Then, look surprised when it didn’t work, the first was when my family was ordering food at a restaurant. It happened a second time while waiting for the bus at college. This is harmful to me as a a person. I am a person with a disability, that means that I need to cultivate and attitude of independence and non linear thinking. I need to be able to be able to think outside “The Box” in order to live the way circumstance says I must. It is exceedingly hard for me to do that if the society in which I must forge a life thinks that I need to be fixed in order to be happy.

I am a Christian. That means I believe that the creator of the universe became incarnate through the birth of Jesus of Nazareth in order to reconcile his creation to himself. I believe he was capable of doing all the things The Bible says he did. I have even asked him to heal me at times, when life seems hard and the simplest of tasks seems impossible. He has not, for reasons of his own, seen fit to do so.

It is precisely because of his decision that I believe I understand something. Jesus did not live so that he could wave his hand and wipe our problem away. We are after all called to love others as we love ourselves, Perhaps The lord allows problems in the world to give us opportunities to do that. Jesus’ purpose was to change people’s thinking about their God and themselves, and finally to give everything of himself so that people could live peacefully with themselves and their creator. The Lord does not see as man sees,” we are told in 1 Samuel 16:7 “Man looks only on the outward appearance, The Lord looks on the heart.” Jesus ministered a lot to the disabled his many acts of healing were meant to inspire those around him to think of them as God did, and still does, as people with a purpose.

I don’t understand why I must live this way. I certainly don’t like it, that’s true and sometimes, I wish things could be different. It would be easier for me to live this way if some people didn’t look at me and see someone who could be healed by simply laying on hands. I don’t want to preach to people, or tell them what to believe, but they’re when I wish I could tell those faith healers, if they were truly to see me with the eyes of God, they would have seen someone with purpose. I don’t know what my purpose is, but I do know that I’m not a magic trick.

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